Inspired by Much Ado About Nothing’s post, which incidentally was quite interesting, here are fifty things about myself that I’m going to share with the class.
1. I was born in Limerick City in Ireland, and I only returned there for the first time last year. The nickname for Limerick, Stab City, rings true for me in the sense that I’m a hazard to myself when wielding large knives. I’ll probably lose a finger in the name of an oven pizza someday.
2. I was a super happy baby; I rarely cried. The only hassle my parents had with me was getting me to sleep at night, I was the ultimate Nocturnal Baby. Contrast that with my younger sister, who couldn’t be away from my mother for more than tens seconds without screaming the house down.
3. My first memory is when I pulled a heavy plate on top of my head when I was two years old. I can still see my mother phoning an ambulance from our kitchen phone. There was a lot of blood too.
4. I have quite an impressive long term memory. Whenever disputes arise over stuff that happened years ago, I can be called upon to give an infallible account of what actually happened.
5. I’ve been to the Cliffs of Moher, but I was in utero at the time so I guess it doesn’t count.
6. I’m right handed but I couldn’t figure out a conventional way of writing until I was about 19. Until then, I looked like I’d been taught to write by a cat.
7. I never met my paternal grandfather, who died in the ’80s. He was twenty years older than my gran, and would be well over one hundred if he was still alive today.
8. I am half English, half Irish. My mother comes from Sheffield, my father from Co. Wexford. My father apparently has French roots (and a very Jewish looking mother) and my mother may have some African roots in there somewhere. So we all look Spanish.
9. I hate tea. This is nearly grounds for citizenship revocation in Ireland but I care not.
10. I’m extremely clumsy and uncoordinated. Waitressing has helped knock the worst of it out of me, but I’m still a danger to myself and those around me.
11. I was never, ever sporty (largely as a result of no. 10). Even today, the sight of a hurley still breaks me out in a cold sweat.
12. I enjoy swimming though, even though I’m useless at it. There’s no nicer feeling than floating around in the sea on a hot day… once I get over how cold the water is.
13. I’m always cold, unless it’s warmer than 18° out. And in Ireland, that doesn’t happen too often, with the notable exception of our current heatwave. I’m like an Eskimo the other 330 days of the year.
14. I’m short, like 5ft 1″ short. Jeans shopping is quite an torturous endeavour at times.
15. Chocolate is my favourite food, and I firmly believe that it cures all ills, especially those related to PMS.
16. If I were to choose a last supper, it would have to be prawns in filo pastry to start, medium rare sirloin steak with garlic butter, gratin dauphinoise and vegetables, followed by chocolate fondant for dessert. All washed down with an ice cold Diet Coke. And yes, this last supper would have multiple courses.
17. I’m really good at culling possessions. It happens every year when I move home from Dublin for the summer and I’ve to try to cram two bedroom’s worth of things into one rather small room. Ruthless is my middle name.
18. Actually, my middle name is Rose. My first name is Emily, so I’ve got an old lady name. Or the name of a fictional teenager possessed by demons. Take your pick.
19. I learned to read exceptionally quickly, according to my mother. I put it down to my long term memory being quite good. But it also meant I got into trouble at school for finishing my work quickly and reading Harry Potter instead.
20. When I was sixteen, I scored in the 99th percentile for kids my age in spelling. Thank you again, memory.
21. I suck at numbers. Anything beyond basic 2+2 arithmetic just puzzles the bejaysus out of me. If it wasn’t for calculators, I’d probably have been sacked by now for unwittingly giving people the wrong change all the time.
22. I hate wearing shoes in the house. It’s just wrong, like wearing your jacket when you’re eating dinner. Wrong, wrong, wrong.
23. I’m far-sighted and as such I wear pretty purple glasses sometimes. The downside is that I’m a bit cross-eyed in photographs. Attractive.
24. I can’t wear any variations of yellow, beige, brown or pastels without looking jaundiced.
25. Every week without fail I make a shopping list, even though I know exactly what I need. But I’ll be damned if I’m walking back to Tesco just for milk.
26. I’m really lazy, except when it comes to my make up. I won’t exercise if you paid me (unless we’re talking substantial payment…) but there’s no way in hell I’ll go to college without my full face of warpaint.
27. Also, I won’t be rushed. I take my sweet time getting ready in the morning; showering and getting organised for the day will be done at my own leisure.
28. But I’m usually very punctual. Unexplained tardiness seriously annoys me so I usually make a big effort to get places on time.
29. When I get angry, I cry. This usually demeans any kind of stance I’m trying to take; it’s hard to take a blubbering mess seriously!
30. Disney movies are my favourite films of all time. Feck your latest Oscar winner, I’m off to watch the Lion King again.
31. I’ve lived in nine homes since I was born. Two of my favourite smells from childhood are fresh varnish and newly painted rooms.
32. Another favourite smell is Silk Cut cigarettes, as smoked by both my parents and my gran. Probably not very PC, but there you go.
33. My boyfriend and I have a serious guilty pleasure – trash tv. Anything from Geordie Shore to My Teen is Pregnant and So Am I and we’re all over it.
34. My birthday is exactly ten weeks to Christmas Day.
35. I love table quizzes. Love them.
36. Left and right confuse me. Never ask me for directions because I could very easily send you to the opposite end of the country. I’ve turned left instead of right (or vice versa) at junctions without even realising my mistake until it was pointed out to me.
37. I’m a fairly poor driver, partially because of no.37. I see repeated driving tests in my future.
38. I met Fall Out Boy when I was 17. Quite easily the most starstruck moment of my life, which isn’t really saying much.
39. At 3am on a Saturday night, curry chips are my weakness. No regrets.
40. I have a great ability for talking shite with people. If you catch me in a good mood at work, I can exchange pleasantries and nonsense with you like nobody’s business.
41. I am awful at counting, so I could easily have skipped a few numbers.
42. I can’t stand the smell of petrol.
43. I have my nose pierced, and it’s been one of my best life decisions so far.
44. I hate when people take my things without asking.
45. I had over thirty Barbie dolls at once stage during my childhood. We were BFFs.
46. According to my boyfriend, I talk incomprehensibly in my sleep. I even punched him in the back once because he lost his keys in my dream.
47. I get really cranky when I’m tired or hungry. If I’m both, don’t even talk to me.
48. Wine, navy and grey are my favourite colours to wear. I have numerous wine dresses and no intention of stopping buying them.
49. I’m bad with money; anything I get is gone out of my hand within seconds.
50. I’m awesome at writing lists.